Guess What We Did...

Well, it is official we moved again. Clearly staying in one place for almost ten months is wayyy too long for us. This move has been harder for me than those of the past because it isn't a move that I would have specifically wanted to make. I am a firm believer in the saying "everything happens for a reason" though so I am keeping my eyes set towards the future and my spirits up.

4th of July Madness

Last 4th of July Ale and I were living it up in Miami.  Still only dating.  It is pretty amazing to see how different things can be in a year.

Having the house this year we decided to host a little get together with some of our family and friends.  Coming from New York and New Jersey they thought that the house by the sea was pure heaven.  We would have to agree.

My SIL, Evelyn, and I tried to encourage the two brothers (our husbands) to start there own business so we could make a million dollars.  The italian response?  "What do you need one million dollars for? Once you have one million you will want two, then three, then four."  Touche my boys.  That's why we keep you level-headed jokers around.

The night and day was full of eating, drinking, chatting, dancing, haircuts, smores, bbq, beach and fireworks.  A perfect 4th of July.  As long as you are with the people you love, there really isn't anything else you need.

The 25th Year

Ale had to work on my birthday so my Mom and brother came up to celebrate.  We checked out a new restaurant for lunch and hit up good ol' DQ for dessert.  For lunch we went to Aspen in Old Saybrook. My brother and I had the lobster special over pasta while my Mom got the short rib sliders.  We all started with the calamari appetizer and I had a white sangria.

Overall, the meal was good. I would go back again because the calamari was great and I would like to try some more of their small plates.  Ale and I have a really hard time finding restaurants that we like in this area.  Between his cooking and having lived in Manhattan, we are completely spoiled with good food. What used to be a favorite past time for us, is now more of an afterthought because we have no groceries in the house.

On Saturday, Alessandro decided to "officially" celebrate my birthday by taking me on the Essex Dinner train.  Essentially what it is is an old fashioned steam train from the early 1920s that takes you up and down the Connecticut river while serving you dinner.

It was a really fun experience.  Ale and I kept making jokes about how happy we were that planes were invented because of how slow these trains used to go.

For dinner we started off by sitting down to a plate of veggies and crackers with some kind of roasted red pepper dip. The servers then brought out the salads and bread. For entrees, I had the prime rib and Ale had the chicken francese. For dessert you had the choice between chocolate cake and tiramisu.

We had read reviews ahead of time of people complaining about the food but let's be honest, you aren't going on the train for a five star meal.  The food was fine, but we knew ahead of time that we were going for the experience.  It was a fun ride.  We saw Gillette Castle, the Goodspeed Opera house and beautiful views of the Connecticut river.  The entire trip was just short of two and a half hours.  It definitely felt like something different to do for a celebration and we are very happy that we found it and went.

 What I Wore:

 Blazer: H&M (similar)
 Dress: American Rag & Similar here
 Shoes: Steve Madden (sold out) Similar here
 Bag: BCBG Outlet
 Necklace: Touchstone Crystal- Timeless Treasure Necklace

Things I Love

Sleeping In
Getting lost in a good book
Checking things off my to-do list
Traveling to an undiscovered place
Enjoying a glass of wine with friends
Finding the best new local restaurant
Sunday dinners at my parents' house
Falling asleep to the sound of the rain
The feeling I get when the house is clean
When my husband unexpectedly kisses me
When my puppy is asleep on me and the world is calm

To My Parents...

I probably don't say it enough....

I know it's easy to get caught up with the day to day....

But the relationship that I share with my parents....

Is a blessing and a rarity in this day and age.

Growing up, my parents affirmed their role in my life. I heard the phrase "I'm your Mother, not your friend" more often than I'd like to admit. I now realize, my Mom wasn't pushing me away, she was just trying to teach me about respect.

Well Mom and Dad, it seems somewhere along we became friends too.

To the people that taught me:

Money will never buy you happiness

Treat everyone with respect

Work hard because nothing is owed to you

Self pity only drains your energy

Life isn't about "things" but rather moments

Be grateful for everything

I thank you.

Even though you have given me everything I could ever ask for and more. You have also given me the determination, love, and motivation to never give up and never feel hopeless. You have taught me the morals and values that lead to a life of happiness regardless of what I have.

And for that I thank you Mom and Dad, because those gifts can't ever be bought in a store.

Surprise!

When Alessandro woke me up by announcing that he had a surprise for me, I immediately threw the covers over my head.  You see, I'm one of those people that reads the last chapter of a book first, that looks up the movie synopsis before I start watching the movie and who rejects plans with everyone unless they are on my calendar two weeks in advance.

I like to know things, I don't like spontaneity and I like to have plans and checklists for anything and everything possible.

Courtesy of ABC news

I don't like surprises.  Big or small, I like to know about anything that involves me at all times.  Obviously this has turned into a challenge for certain people (cough, cough) who are determined to surprise me.  Alessandro tried to surprise me by coming to visit me for my birthday but through perseverance, shamelessness and stubbornness, I got him to admit his surprise before it happened.  Alessandro also tried to surprise me with his proposal.  Though he did surprise me about having plans on the day, I refused to go anywhere with him until I knew the exact location.

Therapists would probably describe me as a control freak. Even though my surprise that day ended up being Alessandro just bringing home my favorite red velvet muffin for me (probably not the biggest reason to refuse to get out of bed), the toll it took on my nerves is probably not normal.

So one of my new goals? Lighten up!

Life has been pretty unpredictable lately. It seems like nothing has been going according to plan. Ale and I have been dealt a few rotten cards which have flipped aspects of our life upside down. Should I sit around and mope? Should I stay up all night trying to revise my plans?

I guess it's time I throw out my plans and instead appreciate the everyday surprises.

Something I learned a long time ago is that staying up all night worrying isn't going to change the outcomes of the next day. Flipping out when things aren't going as well as I had hoped, won't drain anyone's energy but mine.

It's definitely not going to be easy. I have been set in my ways about for about 25 years so I need to start off small. Whether it is not knowing what I'm going to have for dinner tomorrow night or going to the movies without knowing the ending ahead of time.

...I mean the book and the movie are never actually better when you know the ending anyway.

OCM

I believe in natural remedies. When I was in high school, I came down with a very bad stomach disease that had me out for over a semester of high school. I went to specialists up and down the Northeast and tried just about every medicine and got about every false diagnosis.

My saving grace ended up being a Naturopath in town that my family found as a last resort effort. This Naturopath discovered that I had a bacteria/parasite in my intestines, a gluten and dairy allergy, and a ruined digestive track. Through a combination of natural remedies, diet, probiotics and patience, my body ended up healing itself.

I really believe that our bodies were designed to heal ourselves. I believe that all of the chemicals that we consume, use, touch and interact with on a daily basis have been extremely detrimental to our health. That being said, after dealing with acne for a long time, I decided to finally look up some natural solutions to try to combat it.

I have normal skin. I get breakouts a few times a month but it isn't anything extreme. I have some acne scarring on my face and blackheads. It is quite disheartening sometimes when I feel like i'm in my mid-twenties yet still have my skin from when I was 15. What does drive me crazy though, is the blackheads in my T-zone that seem to never be fully out. I have used blackhead strips, exfoliators and cleansers but I always feel like my pores cannot get smaller.

I have spent a lot of time reading about different treatments and methods but the method that stood out the most is called the Oil Cleansing Method.

What is the oil cleansing method?

The idea behind the Oil Cleansing Method is that oil dissolves oil.  Therefore, in order to dissolve the oil (aka blackheads, whiteheads, dirt) in your skin, you need to actually add more oil to your face.

I know this sounds crazy... wouldn't more oil make my face even greasier?

The oil is used to massage the skin and dissolve the oil that has been in your pores. After, you steam your face now that your pores are open and the impurities are finally able to come out. Many have reported that you can actually see the dirt and blackheads being removed from the skin.

How do you do the oil cleansing method?

I'm not going to explain the process on this site because there are literally thousands of much better written articles that you can find with a simple Google search.

What is important to know though is that this method takes patience. Noones skin is the same, therefore you need to patiently try to get the right combinations of oil that works best for you. 


I decided on a mix of Castor oil (a must), olive oil, and Jojoba oil.

What are my results?

I just began this program two nights ago. My face feels awesome after doing this but I am definitely in the purging phase. Because this method draws everything to the top, the purging phase often leads to more severe breakouts as the dirt is trying to rid your skin.

It's amazing that I seem to have dirt where I never usually get pimples.  I will keep you all posted on my results.

Have you tried the Oil Cleansing Method?

Like Crazy

The other night, I sat down and watched "Like Crazy" with Alessandro for the first time. I had seen the movie when it first came out in theaters but after the lapsed time, it feels like a completely different movie.

For those who haven't seen the movie, the basic plot is that a British college student, Ana, and an American student, Jacob, fall in love while she is studying in California. Ana can't bear to leave Jacob for the summer so she overstays her Student Visa. Ana is then banned from the US and a series of situations result that tests the couple's young love.

When I first saw this move, I liked it. I thought it was a very interesting story. Though it seemed a bit "independent" for my taste, I appreciated the rawness of the film. I had just started dating Ale at the time and we had only been together for a few months.

Tonight, watching with Alessandro was like a roller coaster of emotions. You see, this is our story. Though some details and situations are different, the story and the feelings are the same. Some reviews have put the movie down for the filming of a series of moments rather than a comprehensive Hollywood story but I think this is one of the most truthful realities of the movie.

A long distance relationship is "moments". One of the most truthful lines in the movie was when Jacob told Ana while visiting her in London that "he doesn't feel like he's part of her life, he just feels like he's on vacation."

The sometimes bitter truths of a long distance love within the movie made Ale and I remember the truly painful moments that we went through. What starts off as just a young fun love with no consequences, quickly turns into something so much more.

When Ale and I first started dating we were approached by people in our life who had similar immigration situations. They asked me what was going to happen to Alessandro and I? This seemed like a ridiculous question at the time since the relationship was only a few months old and we hadn't spent more than a week physically together. I brushed off the question many times because I couldn't understand why everyone was so serious. I never had plans, I never even foresaw myself getting married so why were people asking about the result of my newly formed relationship?

Over time it became evident. When he came in January, at first as the movie portrayed, it took time for us to get used to each other again. It was weird having him in my world because although we talked everyday, he had never been part of my life in New York. Our relationship was unlike any other relationship because 98% of our dating was done via web. It was emotional, we talked for hours and hours every night. I stayed up late while Ale often didn't sleep just so that we could have every minute together before he had to go to work. Our jokes were via the phone and there was no physical relationship. We sometimes ran out of things to say and would just make noises... We fell in love with each others souls before we could even explore anything physical. So when my boyfriend was physically standing in front of me...it was weird. When you know you only have limited time together though, something beautiful happens. Something unlike any other relationship I have ever been in. You appreciate every single moment. We didn't let go of each other.  It didn't matter what we were doing because we were finally together.

When the trip ended, I didn't know how to act. My act eventually ended in an out pour of tears, knowing that we wouldn't be able to see each other for another 3+ months, when we would have to meet outside of the country due to immigration laws. Words cannot express my sadness, I couldn't even go with Ale to the airport because I was so devastated. In one scene, Ana is with Jacob in London on the train and then it flashes to her sitting on the same train alone a short time later.  This was my life. Trips felt like a dream. Where Ale was for just a moment, he no longer could be. There weren't many options. Alessandro wasn't going to be able to go get any other kind of visa to move here and I wasn't able to pack up and move to Italy or London, where he was living at the time.

The movie is messy, Ana and Jacob both end up in different relationships during the course of their relationship with each other and even their marriage. They are trying to fill the loneliness of not being able to be together with what is physically present.

You cannot explain a long distance relationship until you have had one. Even now, Alessandro and I are tested daily by the tasks of getting a Greencard. There are a lot of formalities associated to marrying someone outside of the US. Even before we set a date for our wedding, we had to consult a lawyer in order to follow Immigration laws by the book.

I said to my sister-in-law the other day, the interview with immigration wasn't going to be the test of Ale's and my love, all of the challenges leading up to the interview have been. When we make it to the interview, that will be proof enough of our love and dedication to each other. She agreed wholeheartedly, being through the same situation only a year prior.

The things that Ale and I have been through already, in just six months of marriage, are far more than some marriages will face in the first ten years. There have been highs and lows and breakdowns but they have never been about "us" or our relationship rather just about all of the politics around legalizing his status.

It really is amazing to see the strength and the patience that my husband and I have been able to have over the past year and a half. For two people who never spent much time physically together, our love is pretty strong. But like I said before, despite the hardships and challenges we are facing everyday, we appreciate every moment together because any moment together, is far more wonderful than even our happiest moments apart.

I Guess I'm Not Human

Is it just me or are these things getting harder....?

Makeup and Beauty Products You Need In Your Life

I have a confession: My Mom and I are beauty hoarders. We might not look like your typical beauty product obsessed because our makeup usually looks pretty au-natural but you don't want to see our end of year balance from Sephora.

Because I have spent so much time and effort finding beauty products that I LOVE, I thought it is only fair to share this precious knowledge with you and save you all a few thousand dollars. Below is my typical list of favorites:

MAC Fluidline:

This is the eyeliner you have been searching for your whole life. My lovely college roommate Jessica (hi Jess!) introduced this to me and I proceeded to use her entire container. Don't be scared because it isn't a pencil. If you buy one of these brushes here, you can achieve even better lines than you would with an eye pencil. I have it in both brown and black and it is the perfect eyeliner, even for a shaky hand person like me.

Murad Clarifying Mask:

I first tried this facial mask when I got it as a free sample from Sephora and I immediately became hooked. My beauty routine is very low-key but sometimes I just feel like I need to do something to cleanse my face and pores deeper. This mask also works great on any breakouts.

Neutrogena Wave

Kudos to my Mom for introducing me to this crazy little tool. I am always super skeptical of cleansing tools because if not cleaned correctly they can be a home for bacteria which just makes your skin worse. With this cleanser you replace the pads after every use. This spinning cleanser is about $14 at any pharmacy and works like a $200 system. Your face will feel so much smoother and your going to get a much better wash.

Benefit Hoola Bronzer

The worst thing in the world is when a girl has an orange face from a bronzer. I tend to go in the opposite direction since I have naturally darker olive skin so often my foundation will bounce off of photos and make my face look whiter. Hoola is my go-to bronzer. It tends to blend into skin better than any other bronzer I have tried and lasts the entire day. Just remember, only put it sparingly on your forehead, nose and upper cheeks to avoid the oompa-loompa look.

Laura Mercier Secret Camouflage

One of the saleswomen at Sephora once said it to me best, "You can't try to hide your pimples completely, you just need to take the red out and that will draw the eye away." This concealer is great because it comes with a lighter concealer and a darker concealer in your shade so you can blend until you get the perfect shade for your face.

Smashbox Photofinish Foundation Primer

I foolishly ran away from primer for years thinking it was only something I needed for heavy makeup. This primer is the key to everything because it prepares your skin for the makeup, makes the makeup stick and last longer and deters shine.

Laura Mercier Loose Setting Powder

I tried Bare Minerals makeup when it was all the rage but it made my face itch. When I started working in an office daily under artificial lighting at a desk for hours, my face was put to the test and I realized just how greasy it can get. I had to come up with a new makeup routine which consisted of a setting powder. The last thing on my mind during the work day is to schedule time to go reapply my makeup so I use a setting powder which holds everything in place for those 9-10 hours.

Sephora Triple Action Cleansing Water

This stuff rocks! This is a soap free formula that cleanses your skin without drying it out. It uses natural products so it is great for sensitive skin. I often use this after I wash my face to pick up any remaining makeup.

Hourglass Veil Fluid Makeup

I loved this foundation. I was obsessed with this foundation. It was the best foundation. Unfortunately, everyone else loved it too. This item goes out of stock often because of the demand. Therefore, I had to break up with it temporarily and see other foundations. If you can get your hands on this stuff, use it because it is really awesome.  You can send my finder's fee via mail.

Makeup Forever HD invisible Coverup Foundation

This is my new foundation. Easy to find, great to use. I love foundations that feel weightless on your skin yet give you a ton of coverage. Like I said before, because I have such an olive and tanner complexion, any red blemishes I get are very noticeable! There isn't an ounce of red in my skin so I need to always have a consistent foundation.

Makeup Forever Professional Paris, Sens'Eyes Waterproof Sensitive Eye Cleanser

The trouble with wearing contacts and makeup is that you don't know whether to take your makeup off first or your contacts out first. If you take contacts out before you take your makeup off your makeup will run into your eyes and your lenses. If you take your contacts our after your makeup the eye makeup remover usually gets in your contacts and makes them soapy.  This is a cream based eye makeup remover and it takes off everything! You just rub the cream on your eye and then wipe it all off with a tissue. It doesn't burn your eyes and you will never have to worry about it getting it in your contacts again.

Those are my must-haves for now.  What other products do I need to try?

Five Facts Friday

1. Massimo went to the groomer, the groomer said he is a "silly dog".  He now looks drop dead gorgeous except for the fact that the first thing he did when he got home was run in the snow.



2. Reiss is having a sale.  If you still dream of structured and well-made clothing click here. I get dizzy just thinking about my love for their dresses and coats.



3. I am now a firm believer in Ebates.  I was skeptical at first but I just received an $11 dollar check for placing my usual order at Sephora.  Ebates now has a forever spot in my heart.



4. I watched Hungry for Change today.  Can I just say WOW!  I knew that the food industry was bad and marketing was devilish but I'm in shock.  Did you know that technically sugar is "fat free"?? You can't trust what the box tells you because foods that turn into fat once in your body can technically be labeled "fat free".  Also, when food is inspected for nutritional labels, the manufacturers hire the inspectors themselves. They are not from the FDA.  The findings are then submitted to the FDA but the testing and work is done by third parties hired by the manufacturers.  Scary!!!



5. I finished my registries for good last night.  I think that my least favorite aspect of this wedding is the registries.  I don't have an eye for home design and color complementing so I'm terribly concerned that none of my sheets will go with my towels that will go with my dishes etc. etc. I then flipped through the Bed Bath & Beyond Registry Magazine and second guessed all my choices again.



Have a great weekend!

Making New Year's Resolutions is Soooo 2012

Happy New Year!!  Wow I can't even believe we are in 2013.  Did you make a resolution?  Did you break it yet?

I am totally over New Year's resolutions for the following reasons:

1. I am not going to start my fitness plan at the height of "gym" season when rates are sky-high and waiting times are longer than ever.

2. I think waiting till Jan 1st to do something you should have done already to better yourself is a cop-out.  Jan 1st is a marketing dream- so many chances to lay on the guilt.

3. Large changes are PROGRESSIVE.  You aren't going to wake up one morning and change your life for good.  Cut yourself a break, take it a day at a time.

In some ways it seems that 2012 went by so fast and in other ways it lasted forever because of all that has happened.  My life has been completely flipped upside down since the start of 2012.  I have learned so much about myself this past year and have never felt happier.

So what did I learn in 2012?

• You are a soldier of one.  You are the only one you can depend on to remember (and defend) your own self-worth.  Stick to your beliefs and never let ANYONE tell you that you don't deserve something.


• Do what feels right, when it feels right.  Don't let society dictate what you have to do with your future. This is your life and you have every right to live it the way you would like.


• I can live without a manicure and pedicure every week.  This year has had a lot of monetary changes associated to it.  What started out as a very privileged lifestyle has now turned into a more frugal lifestyle. With less spending ability, I have more satisfying things in my life now.  I have discovered a lot of shortcuts though and will probably never go back to the way I spent before.


• You are who you hang out with.  The only thing that is going to make you happy is the people you surround yourself with.  Surround yourself with happy people and it will probably rub off on you.


• There are many fish in the sea, some even live in Italy. You don't need to change anything about yourself to find true love.  Loving your spouse should be the easiest, most enjoyable thing in the world.  If there is anxiety, fighting and abuse, it's not love, it's drama.  If you don't have the love of your life yet, it's just a matter of time and let fate play its role.


• Throw out your schedules. You don't need to plan everything.  As soon as you make a series of plans, God laughs and turns your life inside out.

And finally....

Be grateful.  This year I have never counted my blessings more.  I have a loving healthy family, sincere and hilarious friends, the most giving and playful husband and a mischievous yet cuddly puppy.  I am finally using my days to do things I love.  I am exploring new hobbies and I have stopped restricting myself.  Most importantly though, I am finally taking back the steering wheel to my life.